When Delaney (my 14 year old) came downstairs this morning, she was grumbling and fuming. Soccer pre-season began this week. So after a summer of sleeping-in, she’s getting up before 7am. Let’s just say she’s been a little tired in the mornings. I don’t know about your family, but when the members of my little clan are tired we tend to be a tad grumpy. Even cranky. Bristly, perhaps. Irritable. Plain Old Angry. I’ve learned to give my girls a little space when they’re feeling this way. That’s a little piece of wisdom that didn’t come readily or easily to me. Because I like to talk things out. Get to the bottom of things. Solve problems. Trouble shoot. That’s usually a pretty good thing. But on these grumpy mornings my little interventions seem only to fuel the fires. And sometimes we’d end up in an argument. It took a while, but eventually I figured that out. So while she ranted and fumed, I just made breakfast. And kept my mouth shut. Looking up from time to time and nodding to let her know I was listening. But generally staying out of the way.
While she was sitting across from me sipping her smoothie she grinned and said, “Guess I’m wearing my grumpy pants today and I’ve got ’em cinched up really tight.”
The storm had passed and the sun was peeking out. I just love that kid. Even when she’s wearing her grumpy pants.
Marleigh at Popham Beach, Maine. Labor Day 2012. She chose this photo.
I’ve been doing a lot of energetic bodywork with my oldest daughter, Marleigh, to address recent difficulties focusing and concentrating, falling grades at school, and general sadness. This normally straight A, sunny spirited, well-adjusted, strong gal was struggling. We did a lot of energy clearing and balancing work. At first we worked two or three times a day, then once daily, now a few times a week, though we both agree daily is great. Midterm exams were last week and we felt the tests would be a decent measurable gauge of progress. She did really well on all exams and we were both pleased, and proud. Of course this grade improvement is due to her return to good study habits, inviting friends to study together, getting tutoring help from her aunt the Math Wizard (thank you Janet!), etc. She really applied herself and put in time and effort. And it paid off. Did the bodywork get her good grades? Of course not. She did all that. But the bodywork did help her to ground herself, focus her attention, absorb, and retain what she was studying. Success. She feels good. I feel good, particularly as her mom of course, but also as her massage therapist. The teen years are, among so many things, a bombardment of challenges. I witness Marleigh handle these challenges, and all aspects of her life, with grace, humor, compassion, and pizazz. And that feels great too.